aving been a recreational swimmer for several years now and asking people who don’t swim ‘about swimming’ the usual answer I get is: “I am just not a swimmer”, “I don’t like the water”, “It wrecks my hair or skin”, “I used to do it”, or, for those who do: “I need to swim regularly, in fact the day is not the same when I don’t”, “Swimming helps me clear my mind, it relaxes me or it wakes me up”.

The first thing to note about swimming is that it’s done virtually in your ‘birthday suit’, your body which for many is a very ‘big’ problem. Many readers may be not like their body’s shape, size or general appearance and therefore the thought of the body being ‘seen’ is abhorrent, an anathema. In the post on ‘Where Do You Really Live? A new address with Mind Management Psychology we suggested we all really live in our bodies. Swimmers know this well.

Once you get over the body being on ‘public display’ you realise two things. 1) All bodies are imperfect and 2) Although the body is critical for empowering the swimmer, once you start swimming this has an immediate impact on your mind, on expanding this mind. And this mind is the KEY to empowering whatever you do. If you don’t believe this, then simply try it.

BUT….slow down in the water, feel being totally surrounded by the water, and RELAX, don’t panic and don’t fight it, use it and it will support you.

And we all know of course the mind doesn’t just do as it’s told, it needs to be trained, daily. This is what we do at MMP. When you swim you don’t worry about your body but over time marvel at what it can do for you. Swimmers appreciate this. Similarly with the mind over time you get to marvel at what it can do for you once you regularly train it. Swimming and mind training have a lot in common.

For swimmers all bodies are on ‘public display’; that’s the way our bodies really are, imperfect and slowly ageing, they’re meant to. So training is required to slow this, your mind feels better, so do you.

The common engredient in swimming is breathing and being immersed in a different medium namely water. Of course it’s non-weight bearing, gentle on the body and highly anaerobic in its impact. The most aerobically fit people are swimmers. Again, relax in the water, don’t go too fast at first, warm up and UNWIND. And an excellent way to relax is simply to BREATH OUT MORE THAN YOU BREATH IN.

Again if you don’t believe this, then simply try it, and let your intuitive mindbe the judge (not just your busy, critical and complaining mind), remembering there are 2 sorts of mind. Re-reading the 10 Mind Management Principles may help. Then get wet, good luck and enjoy as you train both body and mind!

he absolute core foundation underpinning everything we do at MMP is this notion of ‘mind training’. But it’s difficult because the mind is so esoteric and abstract. To make it simpler let’s use a ‘construction’ metaphor. Imagine mind training differently. Imagine what you’d do before ‘constructing a building’. Foundations are the most important part of any building before ‘above ground’ construction even begins, where ‘excavation’ , ‘clearing debris’and ‘footings’ are laid. That’s why they’re always laid first. This of course is of little surprise.

What is also of little surprise is when it comes to the mind we usually want instant and immediate results. We want to quickly conclude construction, to see a complete and finished building, with all the fittings in place. If not we often get frustrated, we react.

So MMP applies pre-construction techniques. These are methods to excavate, to clear and to quiten the mind. Then and only then you can begin to grow with confidence, being more dependent on the internal conditions rather than the external. Because you’re cultivating and training them. Put simply if you want to construct you’ll want to grow! Of course not physically but psychologically which is where the controls for all mind management reside.

Psychological construction is about ‘growth’ so that’s where the focus ‘has to be’. Yes of course it’s possible to build without ‘foundations’ but the results see a temporary and fragile structure, a building prone to structural failure especially in times of stress. Buildings need strength if not they won’t hold up in adverse conditions. But again you’re not a building, right?

Yet the mind is just like a building, albeit a moving, highly energetic and flexible building. They need to be attended to, to be structurally reinforced, to be reguarly screened for weaknesses and to be ‘put to work’. They need to be able to perform in ‘adverse conditions’, often problem solving under severe stress.

In the post on ‘Mind Management Psychology: ‘Each Day Just Keep Training Your Mind’ we emphasised it can be wise and prudent not to give the mind what it necessarily wants (especially when you believe that you will change as a result). And if you still believe you are ‘your mind’ here are some simple questions to ask yourself.

Do you believe that at all times throughout your life that your mind has served you well? Has it been an ally, a trustworthy, loyal and wise guide advising you to stay calm and relaxed in the face of adversity? Has it given you wise counsel and been a good servant? In the post on ‘WHERE DO YOU REALLY LIVE? A new address with MMP’ we suggested we all live in our bodies. So taking care of the physical body is non-negotiable. Have you followed this advise? If not then before you berate yourself the logical conclusion is you cannot possibly be JUST YOUR MIND!

And you may be able to separate the real ‘you’ from ‘your mind’. Once you get a handle on this you no longer have be a ‘slave’ to it, to always obey and follow it. This can be the beginning of a new fresh choice and even a little freedom. BY NOT ALWAYS GIVING THE MIND WHAT IT WANTS!

YOU’RE NOW POSITIONING YOURSELF TO TRAIN IT! AND IT WILL THEN SERVE YOU MUCH BETTER AS YOU DON’T ALWAYS GIVE IT WHAT IT WANTS!

And yes you will still need to lay some (daily) foundations! Then you’ll really be putting your mind to work!

continuing theme in psychology is this notion of ownership. It can cause a lot of heartache and suffering. For example if you have a strong indentity there can be an assumption that you must always have it on display. Commonly strong identities also have a strong sense of what drives them, usually ego, associated with self-worth, self-confidence and importance. And these are yours and non-negotiable, you may in fact feel you OWN them. However there is balance, situations for this to be culled and therefore not displayed.

How does this relate to ownership? Ownersip and too much focus on ownership can cause you to get into trouble by all experiences having to be dealt with, assessed, evaluated and filed. And for the multi-tasking busy mind that can be a headache. It wants everything! But how to slow down and focus on one thing at a time is the antidote. This is the thread of unsatisfactoriness that we all deal with, deliberate focusing. It’s hard but gets easier with practise.

Going fast balanced with being slow, achieving outcomes balanced with respecting process, watching the detail (micro) balanced with the big picture (macro), where we’re heading.

And what depicts legal ownership clearly for the physical world are these notions of I, me and mine. Just listen next time you’re in conversation: the I’s, the me’s and the mine’s. They rarely stop. For the balanced psychological mind there is not too heavier a focus on physical ownership. Physical ownership is fleeting. Psychological ownership is sometimes pointless, so hanging onto it also makes no sense.

Yet because we can be so obsessed with ownership the same physical ownership formula is often applied to the psychological material. This is the problem and because the psychological material although you can’t touch feels so real it has an enormous impact on the way the mind operates. Study ownership carefully, we don’t really own that much, perhaps more accurately we’re all really LEASING. And managing, just MIND MANAGING!

es it’s like going back to school again, or more accurately it’s like you never left. At school you learnt stuff, you probably were force fed a whole lot of information that you think is of little use now. But it was when you learnt that you laid down priceless imprinting.

So these foundations that school taught you were then and remain now critical, you use them every day; probably without even knowing…… so MMP seeks to change this.

At school the interactions with students and teachers taught you a valuable social repertoire which you no doubt still use, the differences and nuances around making friends, co-operation, likes and dislikes. On a practical level learning the alphabet and counting numbers were probably the first structured things you learnt ‘off by heart’. With practice reading followed. These imprints are strong, very strong, so at MMP that’s what we build on.

Mind Management Psychology embraces and nurtures these foundations, which are in fact literally and figuratively the building blocks for a successful life. You go no-where without them. For example there is probably not a day that goes by when you do not access numerical skills, or language skills including the alphabet. Yet these can go largely undervalued. So we revisit these foundations, in a calm and totally relaxed manner.

At MMP we have designed exercises for you to practise ‘concentrating’ the mind for a short time each day. It includes counting, reciting the alphabet a special way and combining letters with numbers. It’s challenging, doable and CONCENTRATES THE MIND! With time, patience and practice you can actually accelerate the rewiring of your brain.

As a result you re-learn to re-appreciate!

es, your most valuable asset is of course the person you most likely at times take for complete granted, YOURSELF! RECOGNIZE THAT FIRST. For example, you can go for many years thinking that your physical health is out of your control until something goes wrong with it, that’s what disease and illness teach us. But today there’s also an increasing focus on the ‘mind’ and its impact on mental health. At MMP we take this very seriously and ask you to respect this most valuable asset by ironically paying a special sort of attention to it.

Also recognise that you may need to be a little selfish (each day) to cultivate this most valuable asset for optimum health. But being selfish in this society generally has negative connotations so we view selfishness in a poor light, to be avoided, it’s bad……. but not so at MMP it’s important to get it right, the right type of selfishness is absolutely ESSENTIAL! So we utterly ask you to revisit this word. We promote a certain sort of selfishness, it’s a non distracting selfishness for a few minutes each day. And it’s non-negotiable for your contentment, happiness and well being. Why?

Let’s remind ourselves, the Dalai Lama speaks about 2 sorts of selfishness: 1. Wise Selfishness and 2. Foolish Selfishness

Today 2 gets all the attention and publicity but delivers very little satisfaction. In fact the more it’s practised the worse it gets. Foolish selfishness can never ever be satisfied as it just wants more, of everything, a better car, a newer house, a longer holiday, more travel, newer appliances, a better job, more money and is usually very adept at complaining. Foolish selfishness promotes a singular emphasis on I, me and mine. Foolish selfishness therefore knows no boundaries so you place no limitations on what it can deliver which adds to the pointlessness and disappointment often experienced.

Foolish selfishness is not giving to others your time, not assisting them when you can and is totally self-absorbed. Foolish selfishness promises a lot but delivers little.

Wise selfishness on the other hand is knowing that unless you get yourself ‘right’ it’s all fairly pointless, you’ll get nothing right. And yes, there is of course a balance.

Remember the more you practise 1 the more 2 diminishes and visa versa. Some good examples of wise selfishness are having a time each day to reflect of your life in a calm relaxed manner, practising the medtation techniques (wise selfishness) taught at MMP. This is paying a special sort of (wise) attention to your most valuable asset, YOU!

he consistent theme here at MMP is simply to keep training your mind, each day. Just for a few minutes no need to over do it. Firstly you’ll need a structure for your mind, a saying, commonly called a mantra, a mind routine or a mental exercise; something that resonates with the essential you and your core self. And it’s this that will calm you down. But yes, you will need to practise by yourself without distraction. Results over time are guaranteed, be patient though.

If you have absolutely nothing that resonates here that’s fine, don’t stress. You are still in a great position to get excellent benefit from a consistent small practise each day. A cogent way to start is with your breathing: simple breath counting, very easy, very neutral for the mind and very effective. Read the post on the 4 week meditation program at MMP because breath counting is the introductory technique taught in week 1.

Remember you don’t have to go anywhere or actively do anything to get benefit here.  It’s about naturally relaxing your body and mind will follow, detoxing yourself, reducing all the drugs including caffeine, and slowing down (not for the whole day of course) just for a couple of minutes, that is all.

The body in its natural state when not drug affected nor threatened tends to relax. This needs to be consciously and slowly cultivated so as you intuitively ‘know’ when you’re feeling more relaxed and calmer.

The emphasis here is on being as natural as possible and paying attention to what you consume (eat) and what you drink. They’re both critical. Being thoughtful therefore is required. No auto-pilot.

Read the post about NON-DOING! It’s not super easy but with practise it’s super possible and super beneficial.

uriosity, interest, a spirit of enquiry or inquisitiveness about your own life, can be like a thread, an intangible something, or a feeling that can be lying idle within us all. It lies there until we make some genuine enquiry, take the opportunity to look carefully, then and only then, something frequently happens to awaken the mind. As it can with all minds. This can put us on a different path, a path of growth, of change and discovery. But if you don’t get around to this then it simply stays idle.

And to have this thread of curiosity or interest woven into your everyday experience so deeply that you embrace even the very mundane serves to develop something special within you and promotes a refreshingly different relationship with your mind. But it does require time, patience and practice. It’s no panacea but simply validates introspection and an enduring interest in your known internal life. This inexorably leads to an investigation which then may lead to valuing and appreciating the richness of life more. If life is a precious gift (McMahon, 2006), the quest here is simply to unwrap this gift both slowly and properly. And if life is really an incredible journey, the further quest may not be just to complete the journey but also to plan it properly by reading the map that is always waiting for each of us to be read.

Maps are made because places exist; they’re like programs, sometimes it’s important to follow a map or program to get to a place, or space, especially if you haven’t been there before. But you won’t see any map unless you a) become a little curious about your life (the gift) and b) decide you want this journey to actually be the best it can be (by training your mind).

At MMP we have designed a map over 4 weeks that when followed will be the beginnning of significant change, improved contentment and understanding, less reactivity and more control. WE suggest you stay curious and continue unwrapping, great rewards can await.

uying new shoes can be immensely exciting, potentially rewarding and quite financially painful, all in one. But there’s also another discomfort or pain that commonly occurs once you start to wear them. Although they can be the best looking, made of  modern materials, maybe European design, perfect heel and hard wearing sole it’s only when they are worn for some time that other issues can arise.

These issues are familiar to us all and can include rubbing by the shoe on different parts of the foot, the skin not being use to a pressure point, could be the back of the heel, any of the toes, the arch of the the foot or similiar. It may be especially so for women that they’re difficult to walk quickly in, or to balance on uneven surfaces in and/or cause you to tire quickly. The usual driver for this is that ‘the material can be quite rigid at the beginning with little flexibility’, or the design of the shoe is ‘not quite right’.

What started off as the best looking shoes can quickly end up as the most ‘painful’ to wear so you stop wearing them. They can sit in the wardrobe with other shoes, still looking good but not worn. You may glance every now and then at them reminding yourself at how good they look, just like when you bought them. You may even try them on and wear them though inevitably the pain slowly returns so you stop. It may be for an hour, a day, perhaps two days then no more. You rationally decide to end the pain.

At MMP this shoe metaphor is very similiar to the exercises we promote for mind training. The whole concept of being in charge of your mind, having a mind that serves you well, that you can rely on is extremely attractive and appealing. So we naturally expect to have minds that do what they’re told, obey instructions and serve us well creating the right direction for us all to pursue in life. Yet this is so often not the case.

What starts off as most appealing for ’you’ and your mind always presents other issues. Just stopping and slowing down for the first time and you’ll see just how busy the mind can be. In Buddhist philosphy this is close to the ‘dhamma’ or ‘universal force of nature’ or ‘the way things really are’ therefore it’s important to recognise this as quite natural. Just like our shoe metaphor when you first stop you’ll notice the mind’s operations. That can be quite unsettling, disturbing and painful.

The question remains whether to stop wearing them or break them in differently, to persevere. It does take time, patience and practise. Take a look at your shoes next time you remember, were there any that were a little or very painful when you first wore them? What can start off as a most ‘painful’ pair of shoes to wear can over time end up being the most ‘comfortable’. The rigidity slowly becomes more ‘flexible’ but only if you wear them, only if you persist.

At MMP the exercises will over time become very comfortable to complete and beneficial for both body and mind. Experiment with your new shoes! They may end up being the most comfortable. Benefits are cumulative, keep practising even if difficult, reduce the time worn but keep wearing the shoes a little each day! Keep practising!

n the MMP program there is one absolute that stands out again and again and again. CHANGE! Yes there’s macro change and micro change, major change and minor change, big change and small change.

The post on ‘MMP and being a small business’ suggests that we are all really ‘in business with ourselves’ and that if we aim low we’ll invaribly succeed but if we aim high we may just GROW. Again while there are some things we can change and seem to control there is much more that we cannot change, let alone control. So don’t always try! Allow change to happen, gradually. Plant the right seeds, nurture them and wait. Watch as change happens!

And over time you’ll see inevitably it’s about the small change. The ‘untrained’ mind of course thinks otherwise, wanting and reacting to big change, major events, and earth shattering headlines. These minds want the best films to see, the most interesting people to meet, the best parties to attend, most interesting jobs to work at, the most successful investments, best assets, coolest clothes to wear etc. etc………..they’re into mega, best and grandest all in a big way!

Yet in the ten mind management principles, principle 1  states the mind is but one aspect of you and not the totally of who you are.

At MMP we say once again it’s simply about the type of mind we cultivate or train. Remember there seems to be two sorts of mind: The first one can be highly charged, critical and continually going at an extremely fast pace, always stressed and wanting things to be different from the way they are; the second sort of mind is more intuitive, calmer and circumspect, able to reflect.

At Mind Management Psychology we aim to cultivate the second sort. Once you can get a handle on the mind’s operations you tend to work out the difference between these two minds and on what you can really change and develop, and what you can’t, then you’ll begin to GROW! You’ll begin this process each day, by focusing on the ‘small change’ and slowing down again, yes, each day. That’s the daily practise, easy to do, minimal time and cumulative benefits. Change will happen, improved contentment and control await.

Ironically ‘Growth’ here is not about taking more stuff on board but simply being clear on observing things more, witnessing them. It’s being clear that change is always occurring, whether you like it or not, every second in respect to your body’s physiology and days, weeks or months and years in respect to other things, such as your own personal development and the physical environment eg. nature, human construction, organisations,  etc.

Therefore it’s important to focus on what we have some control over. If you always take things personally, every interaction, every thought, every disagreement, every situation, every idea then you carry a heavy load. Not only does your ‘untrained’ mind have to evaluate what you are experiencing but it also has to decide how to retain it it if pleasurable, reject it if not. This in psychological terms is ‘suffering’. It’s a gigantic psychological overload! Today, that’s what burdens many minds; minds being ‘untrained’.

The good news is you don’t always have to add to it! Yes you can lighten the load! Give yourself a break. You can with a litte practise “Deliberately slow down for part of each day” begin the training. Change will happen, improved contentment and control await. Try it and see. You decide!
Then you may find you don’t take everything so seriously or personally!

o-one can expect the mind to promote the things you want (contentment, happiness, peace and acceptance) unless or until you invite them in. But of course it’s not that simple. Inevitably in life things are different from the way you thought, planned or expected. Plans go wrong, a problem at work, in a relationship, within a family, finances, your health, an accident etc. In Buddhist teachings this is referred to as the Dhamma. It’s the way things really are. Both good and bad.

At MMP we take the view that it’s important to invite in REALNESS. Be real about your life and invite in this REALITY. For example if you are suffering what can make this much, much worse is to want the suffering to be over too quickly. Try if it’s not life threatening then simply to invite in the suffering and not fight it, constantly. Once you do this become a witness to the suffering lessening in its intensity. Like inviting in your enemies, befriending them. Opening the door, allowing in something you may strain to keep out. Suffering is amplified by fighting it. STOP STRUGGLING TO KEEP THINGS OUT!

This is the key. All becomes less poisonous for the mind and you may begin to feel you can as well live with them. Your mind will initially be shocked, you will be delighted! Stop the fighting in your mind! CALL A TRUCE!

Just try sitting and breathing for 1 minute. Count your breaths, slowly in slowly out, don’t force anything and watch as you calm down! Practise this and don’t react! You’re now not reacting and beginning something different. This is the first step in growing!
At MMP we have designed a 4 week program for you to begin to grow something quite different and to respond to a special sort of invitation. It costs nothing but a few minutes of your time each day. And you will be happier.